Sunday, July 11, 2010

The Evolution of Sisterhood

Thankfully, many of us in this world are lucky enough to have sisters. Depending on your birth order, I guess how you feel about sisterhood may vary. I am lucky enough to not only have a sister, but I have a big sister.

Now if you would have asked me 30 years ago if I was lucky, I probably would have rolled my eyes and given you an exasperated no! I would have told you about my sister having long hair and sitting on top of me tickling me with her hair. I also would have filled you in on how she would scream for my mom to have me stop touching her when we had to share a bed. You see, sisters just do that sort of thing. (For the record, I was only touching her a little, with my toe, just to make sure she was there)

It seemed that the gap between us grew wider for a while. Being a little older than me, she experienced all sorts of things before I did. Career, boyfriends, marriage, children. She knew about all of these things and I was just stuck in my own little world. At times this annoyed me, but now I am grateful. Someone has walked the road ahead of me and can share their experience. You see, sisters just do that sort of thing.

I guess I always knew my sister was there for me, there are numerous stories I could tell you, but there is one that sticks out in my mind. It hadn’t been too long after Mom died, maybe a couple of weeks. I was back at work and had a terrible day. All I wanted to do was cry. At the end of the day I got in my car and started to dial my Mom. I couldn’t. My Mom wasn’t there, she couldn’t answer and solve the dilemma of my day. It hit me like a ton of bricks. I mean, I knew she was gone, but this was the first time I really needed her since she passed. I called my sister hysterical, literally sobbing as I drove down Highway 6. I told her I simply couldn’t do this, I was not going to make it without my Mom. I don’t know how she did it because she was completely calm, and told me that it would be ok and that she would be right over. I told her no, but lo and behold as I pulled into my driveway she was there. So as I crumbled into a mess standing in my garage, she held me and I swear spoke just like my Mom would have. She told me that we would make it, that we had each other and that although it was going to be hard, we would be just fine. Where did you come from? Have you always been this wise? Did I just not listen before? How did you not fall apart when I know you were hurting as bad as I was? Well, I don’t know how you did it Rosemary, but I am thankful you did because I really did believe we were going to be okay.

So whether you are a big sister or a little sister or you just love someone like a sister, be grateful for that relationship. Treasure your similarities and your differences, it is how we learn and grow. It is how we help torment, teach, love and lift up each other. You see, it’s just what sisters do!